All Units be advised...we have a man that can't keep his pants up...

So I went to the movies yesterday (Die Hard 4 and Transformers) for a little bit of R and R and just to have some brainless fun. Well I put on some shorts but forgot the belt. No these are shorts that in the past I haven't NEEDED a belt for so you understand the reason why I felt it would be ornamental at the least and cumbersome at the most. Well I saw the first movie, killed an hour to eat and then saw the second movie. By the time I got back to the car I was nearly running with both hands on top of my shorts because they would barely stay up!!

I'm losing inches folks and it's starting to freak me out! I know this is a good thing but will someone think of the children???? WHY DOESN'T ANYONE THINK OF THE CHILDREN??????